This Hidden Voice

All my life I've been the quiet and shy girl.It may seem like I don't have a lot to say.When you observe me you may presume I might not even have the voice to speak.Sometimes in some places I'm socially awkward.I stutter a lot.I use plain words.It's just like in church at I.F.C.(International Fellowship Church).There the youth is always in their own world always having a topic after the other for the conversation.I know that the youth is very friendly but I hardly talk with them because I'm shy around them.In certain environments I sometimes never talk because I'm extremely shy.I've realized from the past year that a new talent or gift has developed within me.And I believe it was given by God.I know I'm not exactly the most articulate and eloquent one around.I sometimes stutter and repeat words.I speak in such a weird way.I know my grammar is good because I've been in America all my life!But at times I feel like I'm talking gibberish as if I just recently learned English yesterday.I feel embarrassed about that.But when I take the time to think I can write things on paper or type whatever I want to type.And the words will just flow out of me.Then I feel like I have power in my voice.It truly amazes me.Many people say that I write beautifully and that makes me smile.I also have a passion for poetry.I base my life on my poetry and I write narrative poems.I take my anger, frustration, sorrow, pain, joy,and inspiration on writing.That's why I have this blog today.I want to show the world how I like to express myself.I think God does certain things in your life to shape you into the person you are today.I believe that God has done certain things for me to make me as a writer.And whenever I feel insecure and feel low I look at my writing.With amazement I realize that I have such a special voice.It's so precious because it was given by God.Before I used to condemn myself and think I have no purpose in this life,but I was wrong about that.There's a reason why God placed me in this world and I need to find out what that reason is.I have a mission to serve God and glorify His name just like every other Christian out there.Maybe He's given this special gift to me to help other people in this world.I also have the gift of convincing.I can change the perspectives of people.I remember how I wrote this letter saying to all my teachers that I don't deserve detention just because my classmates were acting up and I wasn't.And you know what happened after that?They put me in a better class!God is so amazing and yet indescribable!There are no words powerful enough to describe how merciful God is!God has given me a powerful voice.It's hidden inside of me.I may not be able to speak articulately out loud,but when you give me the chance to write on paper or type up something you'll be amazed of how fluent I can speak.I'm a very quiet and shy girl,but I've got a lot to say...

My Daily Medicine

Everyone has some sort of sickness.I'm talking about a chronic disease.Everyone has a chronic disease within them.And no I'm not talking about cancer or asthma.I'm talking about a disease within our spirit.We are all sick people.We all have weaknesses.It could be anger issues,insecurity,or jealousy.Everyone has at least one of these sicknesses.There's no denial.At some points in your life your weaknesses seem to vanish…but for a while.Then when certain problems erupt you begin to break down and your weaknesses pour out.I for example,have anger issues.Even with a simple issue I could erupt like a volcano.But there is hope.Chronic diseases never go away,but it can be treated.Just like our weaknesses,there is healing.God can treat us with a medication for the heart.God is our doctor.He can heal us in parts regular doctors can’t.He can touch our hearts in places where no one has touched before.He knows our every thought.He knows what revolves around us.He is our best friend!And when we come to Him,we can be recovered.My medicine is daily devotion.I read the Holy Bible every morning and every evening.And what I’m about to tell you is true.Ever since I started having daily devotions,my heart has been at peace.Life has been much easier to live.And in every problem that comes my way,I simply laugh.It’s wonderful to say that God has healed me.Just like a chronic disease…my sin nature will never go away.It’s hiding inside deep inside of me.As a human being I’m still imperfect.But my sickness can be treated with daily devotions.The Word of God is not just my daily bread.It’s also my daily medicine.I know whoever is reading this right now might have a sickness too.If you want to treat your symptoms,come to God and he will give you a new life.Start having daily devotions.He will make your paths smooth and straight.I guarantee it!

God's Calling

Every Christian has a calling in this world.We have no idea what our potential is in the Lord.God can use us in such simple ways and yet it could mean so much.Whether it's giving to the needy,spreading the gospel,encouraging others,we could be doing so much.Even I have no clue on what God wants me to do.Sometimes you may have broken hearts,shattered dreams,failed new year's resolutions,and unprevailing goals.Sometimes you hold your hopes high on something that may never come true.I hate to break it to you but sometimes it's true.Things just don't work out.With our human understanding we are ignorant,vulnerable,and clueless.We think we know what's best for us but we just don't.I remember in 6th grade my parents and I went to this agency because I wanted to be an actress,but they turned me down.Maybe that's just not what God's calling is for me.In Proverbs 3:5-6 it said,"Always trust the Lord.Do not rely on your own understanding.In all your ways remember Him.Then He will make your paths smooth and straight."I truly believe this.Our lives just become more complicated when we push things too hard with our own understanding.I cried for weeks after coming to that agency.But now I got over it.I realized that God has a better plan for me.Something that's way better than being an actress.When you let God lead the way,He'll lead you to places you've never dreamed of.He'll lead you places that you've never imagined possible.Just think of the things God can do in your life.We never know where God takes us.The only way we'll ever find out is if we let Him take control of our heart.Let Him be the guidance of your everyday life.If you want to find your true purpose in your life and find your place in this world,let God be the steering wheel of your life,not the spare tire.Here's a song that relates to this situation.

God Speaking - Mandisa

Death of Faith

Have you ever heard of the verse James 2:17?In James 2:17 Jesus said,"Faith without work is dead."I truly believe in that.Because last month God made a big miracle for me.I moved to College Point,Queens two months ago from Great Neck,Long Island.I went to Hannah's school J.H.S. 185 or as I'd like to call it Bleeker Middle School.I was a little sad about my class 802.It was a whole different environment.Most of the kids in the class were obnoxious and unfriendly.No one wanted to be friends with me in that class.I made friends with Abigail,Jasmine,Deborah,and Isabella.(Grace is another one of my friends in 803)They were all in 823 which happens to be a top class.I didn't make it to a top class because I got 3's on my state tests.During December I prayed hard to God and asked if by any chance I could move to 823.I asked if there was a possibility that if the principal did move me above all SP classes it could have been 823.One day on January 14 our class 802 had detention for misbehaving.I was punished along with all the others even though I didn't misbehave!I was infuriated and cried at detention.Later that day Mrs. Long yelled at the class and said how tired she was of their behavior.Then suddenly I felt like God spoke into my heart.Like a little whisper He told me to do something and take action.He told me to write a letter to all my teachers complaining my rights.So in the letter I mentioned about the detention and how unfair it was that I got it even though I didn't do anything wrong.I said it was the same exact thing that happened to Jesus Christ.I said that He died on the cross just for preaching about love and compassion.He never did anything wrong.He just died for the foolish sins of this world.I begged for a transfer in the letter.A week after I gave out those letters the Dean of 8th grade Ms. Davis gave me the schedule to 823.I was welling up tears of joy.I was just so happy.I didn't know how to repay God except just praise His Holy Name.God works in small ways just to help us out in life and turns it into big things.God is so amazing and yet indescribable.No one can measure what He's worth!Hallelujah!!I'm so happy to be in God's hands.I'll let Him lead the way in my life.Whatever I pray for must also include action.Faith without work is dead.If I never had the nerves to write a letter like that I'd never end up in 823.So keep faith alive by putting effort!Don't take the death of faith!