I was in such a bad mood

I hate it when my spirit gets defeated and everything that happens just feels wrong. I hate the frustration and anxiety. I hate my pessimism. I hate my sins, my mistakes, and my weaknesses. Today, I realized I was far from what was sane and okay. I decided to just simply read my Bible. I randomly turned to a page. There, I glanced at a verse.

Romans 5:8-11 ”But here is how God has shown his love for us. While we were still sinners, Christ died for us. The blood of Christ has made us right with God. So we are even more sure that Jesus will save us from God’s anger. Once we were God’s enemies. But we have been brought back to him because his Son died for us. Now that God has brought us back, we are even more secure. We know that we will be saved because Christ lives. And that is not all. We are full of joy in God because of our Lord Jesus Christ. Because of him, God has brought us back to himself.”

I started crying like crazy. I don’t know if I’m too sensitive or what? But either way, it convicted me knowing how much Jesus Christ went through. He did it all for every being in humanity. That doesn’t leave out anyone. So no matter how bad our mistakes are, we need to remember that Jesus sacrificed himself to save us. We don’t need to surrender or give up, just because we messed up so terribly. There’s always this negative voice that tells me, I’m never good enough, I should give up, I have no purpose, I’m useless, etc. And the bad part is, if I’m having such a bad day, it’s easy for me to believe all of it. But I need to keep in mind, that Jesus didn’t die on the cross for nothing. Especially when I realize how much God loves me, I shouldn’t take that for granted. No one should. God loves us, despite of all our sins and mistakes. We may stumble a thousand times, but God is always there, welcoming a helping hand. Sometimes, it’s hard for us to see it that way. I know, it’s tough. But everyday, whether we like it or not, there is always a spiritual warfare going on. But as children of God, we have to stay strong until the very end. In Matthew 24:13 Jesus says, “But the one who stands firm to the end will be saved.” God loves us dearly and we need to keep that in mind. We don’t need the circumstances of this world, or the little pessimistic voices in our heads to defeat us. Because God is bigger than any of the trials we face.